So this morning I took Jack with me to do a few jobs up town and left Harry with Andrew as he is on holidays to make things a little easier on myself – how wrong was I! First we went to Woolies to get some more nappies for Jack and some baby wipes, “mummy ball” okay mate you can have a ball because you’re being so good. Next stop was toy world, we had to pick out a new helmet for Jack so I can take him riding (on his push bike) on the path that leads through town in the afternoons. He wanted a pink helmet so I said okay let’s get it, then he decided he didn’t want a pink and had to try on every helmet in the shop. He ended up deciding on Thomas the Tank engine – okay good let’s go. Next door to sports power to get mummy gloves for training, surprisingly he was so good up until that point that I thought I yeah I got this…
Back in the car and the next stop was target to get a new pair of shoes and as soon as we walked through the door there appeared a miniature Satan ready to rule the world. We went down to pick a new pair of shoes and something that should have taken 5 minutes took about 15, at that point I started using the threat “okay we’re not going to Karen’s for coffee.” Usually that gets his attention because he just loves Karen and the girls at JK’s deli.
Then we walked out of target and he couldn’t just walk beside me, nooo that was too hard – he had to roll down the bloody ramp. Then I opened the car okay Jack hop in the car hop in your seat so we can go for a coffee Karen’s. Yang Karen’s. We got across the road and I was parking as he started bawling his eyes out… What’s wrong mate I asked them, “I just want to go home.” Damn I was really looking forward to a double shot iced coffee with a shot of vanilla and as my third morning coffee fix for the day (yes some may say I am addicted to coffee).
It’s different going from this person who had to literally bring herself back from death to having all these big goals of taking on the world and trying not to spread myself too thin across the board and making sure everything is done to the highest standard. Only being one person trying to build a brand is probably the hardest job I have ever taken on in my life – I’m not saying I’m giving up I’m just saying I’m tired. I have a massive to-do list every day with probably three jobs that I have to do for Aquo and the rest are jobs to do around the house all jobs up town.
I’m trying to figure out my why, and trying to be the change I wish to see in the world. And on my wall as I’m writing this I look up and read – heavenly Father, you know every decision I need to make in every challenge I face. Please forgive me for the times that I try to figure this life out on my own. I need you. I need your Holy Spirit to give me strength, with some, and direction. Amen. As I read this I realize that what I’m doing at the turtle speed I’m doing it at is enough. I don’t need to try any harder, everything will happen for me at the right moment all I have to do is keep myself focused as well as organised and everything will eventually fall into place.
Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying ‘I will try again tomorrow.‘ – Mary Anne Radmacher
Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. – Thomas Edison
Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out. – Robert Collier
Courage is not having the strength to go on; it is going on when you don’t have the strength. – Theodore Roosevelt
As I’m writing this I feel that close to a breakthrough it’s not funny! – and remember when things got tough, all the greatest people in this world all have one thing in common – THEY NEVER GAVE UP! I WILL NEVER GIVE UP – tomorrow is another day and I will try again.